Back On Track

Quick update before first pitch of Clemson-Wofford here at Doug Kingsmore Stadium.

Weighed in today, and I lost 5 pounds this past week. Was almost close enough to round off to six, but not quite. Still, mentally seeing that crooked number on the right side of the scoreboard means a lot.

The motivation to keep it going has kicked back in.

So, that's five down on my attempt to lose 32 pounds by my birthday on April 14. It also puts me back to 103 total pounds lost.

The New Scoreboard:

Week 1 - Lost 5.

New Momentum?

Not to jump the gun, but a courtesy look at the scales this morning shows I'm back on the straight and narrow.

It's good to see. I've been working out hard with Vernon, and I'm really enjoying the morning sessions on Tuesday and Thursday. Seems to help get the day kick-started.

Also, last week was the first time I've worked out the scheduled three days per week in about a month. And getting the early sessions is going to keep me from missing in the future because of schedule problems.

I should also mention that my wife has played a huge part in getting me back on track. She has really gone above and beyond of late to go deep into the recipes provided to us, helping me get significantly more variety that the past 2-3 months. It has made a huge difference.

It's nice to be back on the right track.

Remember, the short-term goal is 32 pounds by my birthday on April 14.

Right now, I'm feeling confident I can pull it off.

The Truth Hurts

Well, hit the scales this morning. The results weren't pretty.

Weighed in at 381 pounds. That means since Christmas I've put on 14 pounds, which shows you just how quickly everything can go to hell in a handbasket. What's that, seven weeks or so?

Scary. And this is after dropping 2-3 pounds since Monday morning.

Oh well, there's nothing I can do about it except get back on the stick. Which I have been for the last two days.

So 381 will be the starting point for our second go-round. My short-term goal this week is to get 4-5 pounds off and get back above the 100-pound lost mark.

I'll begin with a new scorecard next week.

Back At It

Started the Ultra Fit diet plan at 100 percent dedication again yesterday.

I've also had my first morning workout with Vernon. That was today. Didn't really like getting up earlier than usual, but by the time I was done it seemed to have a positive effect on the rest of my day. Had a lot of energy for my show today, and just seem to be more upbeat.

Don't know how much of that is physical and how much is mental, but I'll take it. Any forward movement is welcome at this point.

I hit the scales in the morning, and I'll be back on my regular Wednesday weigh-ins.

No more ducking and dodging.

Gonna try to meet my mistakes head on and get the momentum rolling in the right direction again.

Getting Back In The Game

Had a long, long talk with John DeFendis late this week.

Just came out and flat told him what I've been dancing around here for the past few weeks. My motivation is waning. I'm struggling to keep moving forward.

I'm scared to death I'm going to undo all the good I've done and be miserable again.

Fortunately, as much as he likes to talk (and boy, does John like to talk), he's also a good listener. And during our two hours together he anticipated virtually every issue or roadblock I had. He had comforting, reassuring words for everything.

I can't tell you how much better I feel now. In the last six weeks or so I've gained back probably 7-10 pounds. Won't know for sure until Monday. But then I'll be resuming the program full bore, without excuses. My regular weigh-ins will resume on Wednesday.

One of the things we've done, at John's suggestion, is set some short-term goals to go along with my long-term goal - which is to be in great shape by late Jan. 2010 so I can participate in the Cincinnati Reds Fantasy Camp out in Arizona.

But the short-term goals are designed to keep me motivated along the way.

First up?

My birthday is April 14. He wants me to lose at least 32 pounds between now and then.

The game is back on.

Quick Update

I know it's been a week since I last updated the blog, but I've been trying very hard to keep my nose to the grindstone.

First of all, I've had the best diet week in a month. I know I've lost some of the weight that I put back on, but I still haven't gone to the scales. As I said earlier, I'm trying to focus more on getting the process back on track. If I do that, the results will come.

I've also been back in the gym with Vernon twice after a two-week layoff. That has helped matters immensely, though I would be lying if I said it wasn't hard going back.

Amazing how quickly one can get "fat and lazy" again.

Anyway, I will probably resume weigh-ins this Wednesday. I really want to have a strong finish to the week and see how things shake out.

After weeks of talk, I feel like I'm finally headed in the right direction again.

Strikes and Spares

If you've never had an issue with your weight it's likely you don't understand the mental ups and downs that come with an effort to drop major pounds.

And to be perfectly honest, I thought that aspect - the mental struggle - was rubbish.

I'd see people on television, or even come across them in public, who spoke with great emotion about the difficulties they were facing; about the feelings of failure that came with even one slip up, and how great was the temptation just to chuck it all and go back to that unhealthy lifestyle for good.

I can't tell you the number of times I wanted to grab one of those people by the collar, shake them violently, and yell "Get over yourself! If you want to lose weight, do it!"

All the while, mind you, I'm ignoring the fact that I'm slowly growing to the size of a small iceberg.

So to say I have a bit of a different perspective now would be something of an understatement. Those of you who have followed this blog for any length of time have seen me go through incredible highs and terrible lows - sometimes within the span of a week.

And many of you at one time or another have wanted to grab me by the neck and give me a good, hard shake.

Trust me. I've wanted to assault myself. And at times I have. There are times that pistol-whipping myself back in line has been effective.

But more often than not it's something smaller, significantly more subtle, that gets the message through my thick skull.

And last night was one of those moments.

Don't ask me how, but last evening my wife and I ended up "glow bowling" with a group of young people from our church. Glow bowling begins at midnight. They kill the house lights, get the disco ball and other such lighting fired up, and basically you bowl as much as you can until 2 a.m.

Flash back to about three years ago, which would be the last time I went bowling.

It was a disaster. We rolled three games, and by time it was done I could barely walk. I had zero stamina, my back and knees were killing me, and I got worse and worse as the day wore on.

It was embarrassing. I couldn't move, I couldn't breathe and - worse - for someone who used to be extremely athletic and competitive, I was just awful.

I left the bowling alley that day both in pain and feeling sorry for myself.

So last night I wasn't sure what to expect. Besides the fact that it was so late (we old folks are used to getting in bed well before midnight), I just wasn't sure what that kind of physical activity would do to my body.

I was pleasantly surprised.

There were six of us confined to one lane, so we basically got 2 1/2 games in before the deadline. And I got stronger and better as the late night wore on.

Took me a while to get going. Couldn't find a consistent release point and I was horrible in the first game. But began to find something of a groove as the second game wore on, and ended up rolling a 143 despite the fact that I did get a strike the entire way. But I did pick up the spare in each of the last six frames.

It was during that stretch that I had my mini-epiphany.

It began to dawn on me that I was getting stronger as the frames rolled by. There was no pain, no shortness of breath. None of the things that made my last attempt at the game so horrible.

And best of all, to me anyway, my competitive juices started flowing again. One of the guys with us had blown all of us away in the first game, rolling something like a 170. And he jumped out to a pretty good start in the second game.

But as I hung around that old feeling came back. For the first time in a long time. I began to play mental games with him ("Hey man, don't think about all that open space to the left. You can get that single, lonely pin and pick up the spare"), and sure enough he started to think. And when he did, his game fell apart.

At the same time, mine was getting better and I came from about 30 pins down to beat him with the 143.

In the third game, I had gone 9/spare, 9/spare, 9/spare, 8/spare and 5/spare in the first five frames before we hit the time limit. Eleven straight frames over two games picking up the spare.

Folks, there was a time in my life when I bowled quite a bit. My high game is somewhere in the 190s. I'd never had a stretch like that in my life.

And trust me, the scores are irrelevant. I'm a horrible bowler, and I know it.

But it was the situation. The culmination of events. The fact that while all those young people - ages 17-24 - were wearing down at 2 a.m., I was getting stronger.

Seems like a little thing, but to me it was a bit of positive reinforcement that I've been sorely needing.

This morning I'm feeling better - mentally - than I have in weeks.

All it took was a good shaking.