Thursday, October 9, 2008

Motivation

As the new program takes hold and the weight loss increases, I've been thinking a lot of late about motivation.

Why am I doing what I'm doing? How and why do I keep going? Why have I made it this far, far beyond any other attempt to lose weight in my life?

The reasons are many.

First, without a doubt, is my family. I've touched on this in the past, but it remains true. I want to be around for my daughters. I want to grow old with my wife. I want my kids to see something they've never seen - a father who is in shape and active and can do things that I simply haven't been able to do for much, if not all, of their lives.

Then there's the personal motivation. I miss being able to play sports. I hate the way I've felt for most of the last 20 years. I'm tired of the back pain, the shortness of breath. From a health standpoint, I'm tired of being a walking time bomb.

And lately there's been an even darker motivation.

Not a day goes by that I don't have a mental image of Anthony Bell. And it's not the smiling, happy, pat-on-the-back Anthony I want to remember. The Anthony everyone loved, and still loves.

No. The mental image I get is of Anthony lying in that oversized casket, draped with a Clemson Tiger flag. Arms by his side instead of crossed over his chest. Clutching an orange flower.

Gone.

I can't begin to describe the impact that's had on me. And any time I find myself wavering, or if the weights at Coops are getting too heavy and I want to quit, that image of Anthony is usually what comes to mind.

Folks, there's motivation. And then there's motivation.

Anthony ultimately lost his battle.

I'd like to think he'd be proud of me for continuing the fight.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

You know Dan, I choose to think that part of Anthony continues to live through your motivation.

knh